Saying “I do” again? Second weddings are very common, and don’t have to stick to traditional wedding “stuff.” You know what you want and what you don’t want, so why not make the planning and subsequent wedding as wonderful as possible? Check out a few ideas to get you started:
Exes and Children
If you have children with your ex, it’s generally good etiquette to let the person know you plan to remarry. Most second marriages involve the children anyway, or even grandchildren! A few ideas for incorporating the kiddies into the ceremony include:
Best Man, Maid of Honor, ring bearer, usher
Lighting of unity candle
Walking down the aisle
Planning and decorating
If the children are a bit upset about the wedding, emphasize that it’s “our wedding” to help them feel involved. You could also have an aunt or uncle watch them during the wedding.
Family Vow Ceremony
Marriage is broader than the union of two individuals, as it’s also uniting two families! Include a small tribute to your new family during the ceremony, such as the children joining you at the alter. Write out family vows if desired as another special touch, or light the aforementioned unity candle. Jewelry, such as the Family Medallion symbol, is yet another way to go.
White symbolizes a new beginning, so if you want to wear white, go for it. Off-white options are also possibilities, or simple, elegant dresses free from puffy sleeves and the like. If you would rather eschew a floor-length dress, cocktail and tea-length dresses make great alternatives. You could even go for a pantsuit!
Since you probably have the household items you need, you may opt to skip registering. Other options include having friends and family donate to your favorite charities, or going the honeymoon registry route.
Again, you probably have all the household items you want, but that doesn’t mean you can’t plan a cocktail party, spa day, girls’ weekend or anything else you want!
Generally speaking, the couple splits all expenses.
In addition to all family and friends, you may choose to invite your exes if on good terms. If not, skip it, unless you really want some drama at your wedding!
The invitations should include the names of the couples only, though adding the children is also a possibility.
While a rehearsal dinner usually isn’t necessary, you can still have a fun night out with family and friends.
Do’s and Don’ts
Do announce your engagement in the paper, and throw an engagement party. Don’t marry at the same location, wear the same dress or rings, or carry orange flowers, as they are a sign of virginity.
There’s usually more children milling around at second weddings, so feel free to set up a play area or room filled with toys, books, coloring boxes and other activity options.
A second wedding at home is a lovely idea, and can include a sit-down dinner, garden wedding or even a barbecue.
Make it as big and elaborate as you want! Whatever you decide, make certain it reflects your personal style. Ideas include mid-afternoon coffee, cake and champagne, mid-morning breakfast buffet, light finger food luncheon, or evening dessert-only reception.
Hope these ideas help you plan a wonderful, special day!