The December holidays are the most popular time for couples to get engaged. I recently read that 1 in 4 couples get engaged over them – and that 1 million couples will get engaged over the 2008 holidays. If you are one of the newly minted brides-to-be, congratulations on your engagement. And welcome to the whirlwind, crazy, exciting and un-ending wedding planning process.
Meg from APracticalWedding.com has some great advice for staying grounded during your wedding planning. She suggests:
While it’s important to set a realistic budget for your wedding, I think deciding to be the thriftiest bride in the world can be equally stressful. A friend recently reminded me of the old saying “their are no pockets in a shroud” and I think that’s a good idea to keep in mind too.
Remember that in thirty years you are not going to remember the font you chose for your programs, or if you wore the shoes with the rhinestone clips, but how you felt walking down the aisle, or how everyone cheered for you both when you kissed for the first time after the vows. If you want to focus on cool details, focus on emotional ones. You’ll remember wearing your grandmothers earrings, and the look on her face when she saw you in them.
You can’t pre-plan joy. Plan your wedding the best that you can, and then just let things happen. The really touching moments will be spontaneous, things people are moved to do in the moment.
Weddings are hard. They are cultural social and financial land mines. They involve 1,000 decisions, about 5 of which are actually meaningful.
Your wedding is not going to be perfect, and if you are lucky, it won’t be the best day of your lives. Hopefully it will be the first in the string of many joyful days together. The sooner we brides come to grips with that, the happier we’ll be! The imperfect details of your wedding are the ones that will turn into really fun stories.
Lots of people talk about creating wedding inspiration boards to help you with the planning process. I actually have a big one in my bedroom, and it’s chock full of pictures of couples looking on top of the world at the end of the ceremony. That keeps me focused on what really matters. What shoes I’m going wear is fun to think about, but it’s not the point.
The first thing we did in our planning was write a wedding mission statement together. We knew we wanted a wedding that was simple, was officiated by our rabbi, included all our families, and was a great party. When we can’t make a decision we come back to that mission statement, and let that guide us.
I don’t talk about my wedding much with friends or co-workers. I don’t need the pressure of their wedding expectations. I do talk about my wedding a lot with my family and my fiance. It’s really important to me that the wedding reflects them as well, and I don’t want to make decisions on my own. Plus, that cuts down on stress later, since everyone had a say on how to do things.
You can visit APracticalWedding.com to read more of Meg’s thoughts on weddings and planning. She seems to keep a nice balance between keeping an eye on wedding details and keeping an eye on what really matters. If you need a reality check during your wedding planning (and trust me, you will), stop by Meg’s blog for some great perspective.