The inclusion of step-children at a wedding creates an entirely new level of intimacy and importance to the celebration. The ceremony becomes more than the joining of two hearts, instead, it symbolizes the joining of two families.
One way to shine a light on the kiddos throughout the event is to create a moment – or a dance – that’s just for them. And there are a lot of ways to go about weaving this through the reception and a lot of songs that fit the bill quite nicely.
Reader Example: Finding a Song to Dance Together as a Newly Formed Family
“Hello. I am hoping you guys could help me out. My fiance and I are getting married in just a few days. This is a second-time-around wedding for both of us. He had the wedding the first time, but I did not. We are having a church ceremony and intimate reception.
The whole concept of our wedding, however, is how not only are he and I becoming one, but we are joining our families. We have striven to incorporate all that is important to us into our ceremony and reception. Honoring God first and foremost and honoring our children having them all hold special roles in our ceremony.
His son is 15 and will stand as his Best Man. His 2 little girls ages 3 and 4 will be our Flower Girls. My son who is 19 will accompany me down the aisle and present me to my fiance. My daughter who is 15 is my Maid of Honor.
We are doing the Unity Candle Ceremony with the song “Yours, Mine, and Ours” playing. After we say our vows to each other, a simple vow will be exchanged between each of us and the children of the other. As well as a short simple vow for the children to say “We do” to.
As for the ceremony part, we have it pretty much covered. However, when it comes to the reception we are stuck in an area.
I will be dancing the traditional Father/Daughter dance with my son instead (son still narrowing down song). He will be dancing the traditional Mother/Son dance, with his two little girls (using “Cinderella” by Steven Curtis Chapman). It is actually a beautiful song (my fiance tears up each and every time he hears it).
It begins with the little girl tugging at her daddy wanting to practice her dancing, then moves to young lady and prom, again wanting to practice her dancing, and finally wedding again wanting to practice dancing.
But the message and focus are on the daddy not wanting to miss the moment and holding on to his cinderella now, dancing with her now because of knowing what Prince Charming didn’t know, that time would pass and Cinderella would be gone.
We, however, did not want to leave out the other 2 children, my daughter/his new step-daughter and his son/my new step-son. We both will be dancing with both of them at the same time to one song. We are having a really hard time finding a good song that would fit both a boy and a girl and not sound like a couple’s love song.
Do you have any suggestions whatsoever? I have searched around but haven’t found anything that I feel would work. Closest I have is…
Just not totally sold on either yet. Hoping you could help me out.”
Our Advice & Song Suggestions
Both of these songs are really great options.
“I’ll Be” by Reba McEntire is about always being a constant source of support and love for someone else – be it a child, friend, sister, or brother, it’s a beautiful representation and message to your new, blended family.
“My Wish” by Rascal Flatts really pulls on the heartstrings with its universal message of love and care for everyone in your life – reminding the children that your goal (wish) for them is to live a fulfilling life full of happiness and you want to be beside them every step of the way.
Some other songs to consider include:
Can You Feel the Love Tonight by Elton John | iTunes | YouTube
This song is from the beloved Disney film The Lion King and holds a lot of meaning to a lot of people. Expressing the moment one falls in love; this can also mean familial love and could be a lovely backdrop to the moment your family truly becomes one.
You’ll Be In My Heart by Phil Collins | iTunes | YouTube
One of the themes from another beloved Disney film, Tarzan, this song’s lyrics is a perfect “love note” to the newlywed couple’s children.
For example, “’Cause you’ll be in my heart, Yes, you’ll be in my heart, From this day on, Now and forevermore, You’ll be in my heart, No matter what they say, You’ll be here in my heart, Always”
Sunshine of My Life by Stevie Wonder | iTunes | YouTube
This tune can be both a love song to a romantic partner or to the kiddos; which we find rather charming and endearing. When you have children, they really do become the sunshine of our lives and Stevie’s song is a nice way to remind them of that.
Rainbow Connection by Kermit the Frog | iTunes | YouTube
One of our more offbeat selection but a family-friendly one as such, Rainbow Connection is a metaphorical beauty and walks listeners through illusions of dreams, desires, and adventures – all things that you wish for your children to attain and experience.
Have I Told You Lately that I Love You by Rod Stewart | iTunes | YouTube
Widely considered a religious or spiritual song, it’s also another example of a beautiful message to send to the kids, especially when they’re blending with other children and could have some worries or doubts of the dynamic of the family from here on out.
It’s a reminder of love and various reasons why they are important.
There You’ll Be by Faith Hill | iTunes | YouTube
Your kids become your constant and this song walks us through what it’s like to have people in your life that will always have your unconditional love. Thinking back on memories and having your children woven throughout, that’s what this song is all about.
Greatest Love of All by Whitney Houston | iTunes | YouTube
One of the more obvious choices of the list but just as beautiful, Greatest Love Of All is truly about the children – all children and how important it is to give them the love and support they need throughout their childhood.
You’re Gonna Miss This by Trace Adkins | iTunes | YouTube
An absolute tearjerks, this country classic tune walks us through the memories parents will one day miss and reminisce on when it comes to the young lives of their children.
Forever Young by Rod Stewart | iTunes | YouTube
This song was written by Rod Stewart (with Bob Dylan) about his own kids! He had missed time with his kids out touring and realized those were moments he’d never be able to get back. Again, cherish those childhood memories.
Here For You by Neil Young | iTunes | YouTube
Young wrote this song about his daughter while she was in her last year of college and although she was starting a life outside of being his little girl, he’d always be there for her, no matter what happens in her future.
Stand By Me by Ben E. King | iTunes | YouTube
This song, also rooted in spirituality, is one of the most famous and beloved of all time. It’s been covered over 400 times and is a stunning representation of standing beside those you love in both good times and bad.
